The evening rays were slipping through the curtains, and I was fiddling with my laptop as usual. Mom had told me just before leaving, that sucheta auntie would be coming home in some time. I looked up through my glasses, nodded. The sun was setting , a feeling of calmness had set in, I could see the birds retiring to their nests and its at the same moment, the bell rang. The spell broke for just a tiny second..only to get back again to a warm feeling of meeting my aunt. It took a while for me to open the door, as I am still walking with the crutches, its almost four months now. And there she was, petite lady , her face showed everything..the years gone by. The smile still intact...her eyes expressed everything that she wanted to say. Surprised to see me opening the door, she asked me where is mom. I said she is on her way home now...and yes I did manage to convince her, that am doing my best to be as independent as possible. I gestured her to sit beside me, and I saw her eyes were slightly damp. There was so much she wanted to share and also feeling sorry for the state I was in. But that's not the point...I felt as if she was wanting me to just ask her to share...I just nudged her to say whats happening in her life..and there it was...waiting to come out....it came like an avalanche of incidents . It poured and poured. I was amazed, to what this lady has survived. And I understood, happiness come with a price..For her children, she chose to be in a marriage, where there wasn't any respect to her identity. A loveless marriage..But this petite lady , did all so well. Sitting softly on the chair, gracefully placing her hands on her lap and talking so wonderfully. Her demure was of a lady deeply hurt, and yet she managed to keep her dignity intact. I kept my hand on her shoulder, giving her a small squeeze , saying I care. My heart just leaped t out, Oh Gosh!...everybody goes through some pain in life.
By this time, mom had entered the room. I could smell the coffee brewing. and it was time to change into a topic that we were all wanting to talk about...the samosas! on the plate looked tempting. I couldn't help but ask my aunt to please pass on...I know it was really childish, but I had to have a very fast bite....Oh! it tasted damn well.
And then very simplistically she continued with what she wanted to share. Its that time, I looked at my Mom, . I knew exactly what was going on in her mind. And a thought passed that even she had led a life quite similar to this friend of hers. I was witness, so were my other other siblings. Everybody has a story to tell, deep profound realities of life. At the same moment, mom looked at me, and smiled..so beautifully, our eyes were locked as if in eternity and the entire journey till this date....just flashed back in front of Us. It was acknowledgement of what we went through in life. Her smile indicated everything that she wanted to convey. That moment, i knew...her journey as my mother and as a wife to my father as well. It was the toughest journey I had witnessed. She is one of the strongest lady I have known. So here I was sitting across between two wonderful ladies of my life. Both of them stood up for what they believed in and sacrificed a lot!.
I could notice the moistness in my aunts eyes and realized even my cheeks were wet. Mom looked serene, in control of her emotions, looking at both of us. Guess, she never showed her emotions like I do. It was getting late, but I wanted my aunt to continue...asked if she could stay back for dinner...so I get to be with her for some more time. I think even she wanted to stay back, but duty called her, she was a homemaker and she couldn't forget that. And then she said those words "nandita! it hasn't been easy at all. All my life I gave everything to this man, remained quiet. I have regrets, wish my father had allowed me to work then, but he just wanted me to get married. And I realized after some years of marriage, this is not I wanted from life. By that time I had two sons, I just kept quiet because I wanted to bring them up in life. But now I cannot handle this man anymore". oh! god so much pain huh!
Is this what women go through in life, just in the pursuit of their happiness. All they get is losing their own identity in the process..All this for nothing in return, where there is no acknowledgement of their accomplishments as a wife and a mother. So who decides this, or are these only for men to judge their women, their wives. Our beliefs are the ones, that allow us to take this mess in life. What if she could have decided otherwise, to pursue the life she wanted to lead....well that's a different topic altogether...will write about that later.
For now...what was happening in the moment, was so beautiful. The letting go off the emotions that she was holding for so many years. I was so happy, that she could share this, without any inhibition.
It was time for her to leave, and there I saw it again, so relaxed and smiling as always...Hey that's what life is all about . With two beautiful women, sharing their lives with me....it was a wonderful evening after all. Unexpected, so connected and a wonderful moment. Wish I could get to spend some more time with them as often as I can. She rose to leave and I gave her a tight hug from where I was sitting. She promised to meet me soon.
She left gently, closing the door behind her, and I looked forward to meeting her again one day!
What a wonderful evening this was!
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